My Heart was Breaking

This morning I had to do what every parent faces eventually. Leaving Isabelle for the first time. We have gone to church twice since I've had her, but both times we've been at other churches and I have kept her with me in worship. Today was our first time to go back to my (well, "our") church and for her to stay in the nursery.

I picked today because Monica (think mom of the chicken, per yesterday's post...) and her husband were the nursery volunteers along with one of our women who speaks Spanish (and only a little English). I figured it was now or never.

First, I have to say that as the pastor it felt very strange to get there knowing that my 'pastor' parking spot would be filled by the guy filling in for me and that we'd have to park on the street. Very weird feeling. It was like we were back but were visitors which, in a way, we were.

Anyway, we got there during the Sunday School hour so that I'd have time to leave her in the nursery and then come and go a couple of times before worship.

She did great until all of the chaos right before worship when the volunteers changed, a bunch more kids/parents were coming and going, etc., and then she slipped out the door when I tried to leave and started screaming. I had to leave with Monica taking her back in the nursery screaming. It about killed me.

This break from the church has been good for me personally and spiritually. I needed it. I think all ministers need (extended) breaks now and then and they are few and far between. The break has been good (and continues until Dec 9) but it also felt good to be back. It's been a while since I could have said that, so I feel good. I feel refreshed and like I will be ready to jump back in by the time I need to, which is also good!

I made it through church, she made it through church, and we even went to Wendy's with the crowd after church that goes every week. Gotta figure out a nice way to tell people they can't just feed her whatever they want to. It is NOT cute. Today wasn't as bad as the chicken stew supper we went to at church Friday night... Oh well, can't complain that everyone wants to dote on her :)

Check back tomorrow...I'm hoping to FINALLY be posting some video clips :)